OK, I’m so confused.
I recently got on the short end of the wrath of the internets on a discussion among church members of “Modesty”.
I thought this was always kind of clear, but apparently not. From the discussion, I guess girls are supposed to be allowed to “express themselves” and to not be “ashamed” of their bodies, but they’re still not supposed to dress sexy and show too much skin, unless, of course, they want to, and dress codes are the new machines of male oppression and men should be expected to control themselves, but they’re not allowed to respond to any visual stimuli regardless of how the girl parades it but the prophet still says you should wear clothing that covers the body areas covered by the garments, unless if your swimsuit is revealing then, that’s OK, because it’s all about comfort, not exposure, and... And...
And I’m trying to sort through it, but I’m getting a bit lost, here.
I do get the bits about dress codes. I hate them, too. I think that dress codes and social dress expectations are more about control than they are about modesty or practicality. Why on earth anyone thinks that a white shirt and a tie are sensible is beyond me. I used to work in a call center. Everyone we interacted with was on the phone. But, arbitrarily, we were required to dress up one day a week. Why? So the management could exercise that bit of control.
I also get the self-expression bit. For many years, in my rocker days, I dressed very rebelliously. Sort of. By that I mean that I had the shredded jeans and grungy jacket and long hair, but all of my garment areas were covered. There was a kid in my old ward that would come to church as a punker, but still in a white shirt. The dichotomy always made me smile.
I also get that a lot of the scars from the ways we were taught about sexual purity in our sunday school and seminary classes are now turning up in therapy. When it comes to sex, we are definitely a peculiar people.
So, I guess I’d like some help here. Are our youth, both boys and girls, still being taught to dress modestly? Is that still valued? Are they being taught why it’s important? Is it still important?
I recently got on the short end of the wrath of the internets on a discussion among church members of “Modesty”.
I thought this was always kind of clear, but apparently not. From the discussion, I guess girls are supposed to be allowed to “express themselves” and to not be “ashamed” of their bodies, but they’re still not supposed to dress sexy and show too much skin, unless, of course, they want to, and dress codes are the new machines of male oppression and men should be expected to control themselves, but they’re not allowed to respond to any visual stimuli regardless of how the girl parades it but the prophet still says you should wear clothing that covers the body areas covered by the garments, unless if your swimsuit is revealing then, that’s OK, because it’s all about comfort, not exposure, and... And...
And I’m trying to sort through it, but I’m getting a bit lost, here.
I do get the bits about dress codes. I hate them, too. I think that dress codes and social dress expectations are more about control than they are about modesty or practicality. Why on earth anyone thinks that a white shirt and a tie are sensible is beyond me. I used to work in a call center. Everyone we interacted with was on the phone. But, arbitrarily, we were required to dress up one day a week. Why? So the management could exercise that bit of control.
I also get the self-expression bit. For many years, in my rocker days, I dressed very rebelliously. Sort of. By that I mean that I had the shredded jeans and grungy jacket and long hair, but all of my garment areas were covered. There was a kid in my old ward that would come to church as a punker, but still in a white shirt. The dichotomy always made me smile.
I also get that a lot of the scars from the ways we were taught about sexual purity in our sunday school and seminary classes are now turning up in therapy. When it comes to sex, we are definitely a peculiar people.
So, I guess I’d like some help here. Are our youth, both boys and girls, still being taught to dress modestly? Is that still valued? Are they being taught why it’s important? Is it still important?
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