So, lately I've been struggling a lot. I've been feeling quite down, and playing the victim very nicely. While, intellectually, I realize that there are people who've been hit harder by this economic turndown than I have, I'm still playing it for as much sympathy as I can.
...And it truly hasn't been easy. My income has fallen to about a little more than half what it was in the early parts of the year. My position in the company I work for is no longer what it was. The cars in my driveway have all decided they want to stop working at the same time as my laptop, and, of course, I can't afford to get them fixed.
On the surface, it would seem that I'm coming up to Thanksgiving day, with a lot of not-so-much-to-be-thankful-for on my plate.
But when I look at it from another perspective, I am very blessed. It's true that my job situation has changed drastically, but I am still employed. There are many in this country who are not. I still have a home. Many do not. I can still make my mortgage payment (even though it is more difficult). Many cannot. Even though my wife and I have both been sick lately, Jacob hasn't.
So, I've been reading in the Old Testament. For about two years, now, I've been on a slow and steady quest to complete that. I've got probably another year at the rate I'm going. But the other day, I'm sitting at work, and on my break reading along. I come to Job. As I read along, I realize that he's my bro, these days. He's not sure why he's suddenly hurting, but it's there. His friends tell him that it's his fault. He sinned, so now he's being punished. His wife tells him to curse God and die. Now, I know I'm not sinless, and my wife's been very supportive, even though she's been afraid, too. But good ol' Job says, basically, "I don't know why God is letting this happen to me. Who really knows God's plans anyway? I just know in the end He'll bless me for faithfulness!"
And so I need to be as well. I don't know what's going on or where it will lead me. I just need to press on and be as faithful as I can be. Just like Job.
MRKH
Mark Hansen
http://markhansenmusic.com
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ReplyDeletedude, you still working for that deceptive family of companies known as Clickincome / Auction Success Inc / Empwronline?
ReplyDeleteI wish things weren't so tight for you so it wouldn't take as much courage for you to just tell them to stuff it. Maybe that would be a trial of faith?
So I hope you find something good soon. Have you tried applying at Mozy.com or OrangeSoda.com? I think they're both in American Fork. There's Omniture too in Orem.
Or can I put you in touch with two of my friends who are some of the biggest bloggers in the state and go to all those blogging and ecommerce conferences here locally -- these people network big time and might know of something on the down low.
Or on the side you could offer to tutor beginning students in Spanish via video conferencing at http://edufire.com - very cool! You charge whatever you want, schedule sessions whenever you want, and they only take 15%.
Well, have a nice Thanksgiving and good luck with other stuff too like your music. :)